Saturday, 27 April 2013

IELTS Writing Part 2: Essay 6

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Present a written argument to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic:

"Some people think that strict punishment for drivers' offenses could reduce traffic accident. Others, however, believes that some other measures should be taken to reduce traffic accident."

Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Do you think the benefits will outweigh the problems?"

Model Answer:

While more and more automobiles brave through the city arteries of the new world, blood is occasionally drawn by tragic accidents. To remedy this, the authorities enact rules of engagement, if we may, and punish the deviants. Some say, such offending drivers should be punished severely and that may reduce traffic accidents. But I believe the correlation of crime and punishment can never fully effect road-safety and to achieve it we must adopt other ways.

Firstly one must understand the paradox – accidents are rarely results of willful malice. Often accidents are caused by errant commoners, which is only human, and while one must accept his liabilities he should not be punished for his mistakes as if he were a criminal. But, of course, violation of traffic rules is another proposition. It is potentially destructive and should be sternly thwarted. Also, strictly following traffic rules does reduce the chance of collisions. Conversely, drivers’ offense is only one factor along with numerous others that cause traffic accidents. So punishment for moving violations may not be proportional to road-safety. What may be more mathematically and practically beneficial are awareness campaigns for road safety. If people are told how they can keep themselves and others safe, if they are inspired to commute more responsibly, and compelled to drive defensively, road hazards can be completely relegated one day.

One should also ponder on the relationship of crime and punishment. Criminals have always been there, as were the rules for punishing them. It has long been evident that persecution alone can never rid the society of felons. So even murder, which is almost exclusively criminal, could not be stopped by punishment. Then how can reasonably naive traffic accidents be stopped by it?

The answer therefore is a sensitive balance of rules and awareness, of knowing what we may not and should not do. Safety on the road or elsewhere lies only in this balance and cannot be reached otherwise.

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