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Thursday 30 May 2013

Model Essay for IELTS - Advertising

A second model essay for IELTS is presented here. This one tackles the subject of advertising.
As with model essay 1, this essay is an agree / disagree essay.
In these types of essays, you are presented with one opinion:
___________________________________________________ Some of the methods used in advertising are unethical and unacceptable in today’s society.
To what extent do you agree with this view? ___________________________________________________
So your options are:
    1. Agree 100%
    2. Disagree 100%
    3. Partly agree
In the answer below, the writer agrees 100% with the opinion.
As you can see, the writers opinion is made clear in the thesis statement (the last sentence of the introduction).
All the body paragraphs then explain why the writer disagrees. In other words, it discusses the negative aspects of advertising.


Model Essay for IELTS 2

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Present a written argument to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic.
Some of the methods used in advertising are unethical and unacceptable in today’s society.
To what extent do you agree with this view?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.
You should write at least 250 words.

Essay for IELTS Model Answer

The world that we live in today is dominated by advertising. Adverts are on television, on the World Wide Web, in the street and even on our mobile phones. However, many of the strategies used to sell a product or service can be considered immoral or unacceptable.
To begin with, the fact that we cannot escape from advertising is a significant cause for complaint. Constant images and signs wherever we look can be very intrusive and irritating at times. Take for example advertising on the mobile phone.  With the latest technology mobile companies are now able to send advertising messages via SMS to consumer’s phones whenever they choose. Although we expect adverts in numerous situations, it now seems that there are very few places we can actually avoid them.
A further aspect of advertising that I would consider unethical is the way that it encourages people to buy products they may not need or cannot afford. Children and young people in particular are influenced by adverts showing the latest toys, clothing or music and this can put enormous pressure on the parents to buy these products.
In addition, the advertising of tobacco products and alcohol has long been a controversial issue, but cigarette adverts have only recently been banned in many countries. It is quite possible that alcohol adverts encourage excessive consumption and underage drinking, yet restrictions have not been placed on this type of advertising in the same way as smoking.
It is certainly true to say that advertising is an everyday feature of our lives. Therefore, people are constantly being encouraged to buy products or services that might be too expensive, unnecessary or even unhealthy. In conclusion, many aspects of advertising do appear to be morally wrong and are not acceptable in today's society.
(296 words)



Comments
This essay for IELTS is well organized as there are five clear paragraphs, each containing ideas that are relevant, well expressed, and related to the topic.
Focusing on the language and structures in particular, the essay starts with an appropriate introductory sentence.  Linking words are used accurately (However, In addition, Therefore).
Phrases that signal opinions are evident (A further aspect of advertising that I would consider unethical. ..) backed up by reasons (...encourages people to buy products they may not need or cannot afford) and examples (Children and young people in particular, are influenced by adverts).
In general, many other useful phrases are used, indicating a good control of language (It is quite possible... Many people consider. .. It is certainly true to say.. .).

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